Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Malaised

Today is my birthday. I SHOULD be waking up and feeling a tinge of excitement about the day and all that lies ahead. Or excited about some special advance purchase of gluten-free cinnamon donuts to have for a special birthday breakfast.

But instead I wake up and feel worn out like I didn't get an hour of sleep (except that I got about 7 hours!). The thought of food sounds repulsive and were it not for the little 18 1/2 month old in the other room I would probably not get out of bed yet. She does make the start of my birthday very special, though and momentarily distracts me from my malaised feeling. She very cutely tries to ask for her daily warm milk to start off HER day with little words of gibberish and as I change her diaper I tell her "Did you know it's my birthday today?" She smiles and her wake-up eyes crinkle. After warm milk we get breakfast (potato pancakes) and then my body tells me it's had enough moving for the moment so I am confined to the couch. I think my daughter believes this is how life is for grown-ups -- prone on the couch or bed all day with little excursions here and there when mommy's face looks more cheerful and vibrant on 'good' days.

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